Sunday, March 27, 2016

Weird things customers say in bookshops (Stanfords edition)

Stanfords is a world’s largest (and best - may I add) travel bookshop and it has also his fair share of costumer’s wierdness. Here is a little selection:

Customer wandering around the ground floor.
Bookseller: "Do you need any help sir?"
Customer: "No, why? Do I look like I need any help??"

Customer: „Where are your books?“

Customer: „I'd like the map of the world that costs 12.95. The medium size."

Bookseller (calling for his colleague): „Lukasz!“
Customer: „Yes I'm paying by cash.“

Customer: "Do you sell Bibles?"
Bookseller: "No, sorry..."
Customer: "But Bible is a way to heaven and you are travel bookshop!" 

Customer: „Is it a globe of the world?“

Customer: "Have you got any travel acessories for pets here?"
Bookseller: "Can you give me an example?"
Customer: "For example a little globe for a cat."

Customer: "Do you do students discount?"
Bookseller: "No, sorry..."
Customer: "Do you do celebrity discount?" 

Customer: „Do you have round atlas?“ (globe)

Customer: "Do you have any books set in Paris? Oh forget it, I've read them all..."

Customer: „Can I pilot a yacht from Dominica to Barbados with this map if the volcano errupts?“

Having bought an AZ map of London, a customer came back a minute later and asked how to get to Oxford street...

Customer: "You sell legendary Moleskines. Do you also sell legendary Filofaxes?"

Customer: "Do you have students for discount?"

Sticker "This is rubbish" was left by costumer in Henry Kissinger's book The World Order... 

Customer: "Are the batterries included in the compass?"

Customer: "Is Poland part of Europe?"

Customer: "Do you have a signed copy of "Go set a watchman?"
Bookseller: "No, sorry, we don't."
Customer: "Of course you don't. I'm the only one who does."  

Customer: "Do you sell waterproof Bibles? In English please..."

Customer showed the bookseller a picture of dog in a harlequin/clown costume asking: "Do you have anything similar to that?"

Customer: "Do you know when Christmas is?"

Customer: "What a fabulous shop! Full of junk!"

Customer: "Do you sell books about sports?
Bookseller: "Not really, we are a travel bookshop."
Customer: "Trouble bookshop???"

Customer: "I want to use a toilet. How do I do it?"

Customer (already buying 6 maps by the cash desk): "There should be a travel bookshop nearby. Do you know where it is?"
Bookseller: "Well, that's us. We are travel bookshop."
Customer (looking genuinly surprised): "Really?? Because I didn't find a map I was looking for here..."

Customer: "Do you have a book called why men love bitches?"

Customer: "Do you sell Pedophiles guide?"

Two teenage girls lean over the counter whispering: "Where is your conspiracy section?"

Customer: "Can you tell me a way to a good bookshop?"


Related link:
Weird things customers say in bookshops

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